Thursday, April 23, 2009

How do I get myself into these things?

Last night I managed to find myself responsible for manufacturing, assembling, and packaging a cd and small prints package deal highlighting Steve's current exhibition in time for their US tour in early June.

I mean we were just chatting away about how great it would be to package the cd of spoken word pieces over music (one to go with each painting) with small prints (5x7s) of each of the paintings and have it for sale at the merch table on the US tour when all of a sudden I hear Steve say something like "maybe this could be your baby...we could sell it on the art site and you could take care of it. Wouldn't that be good?"

Now the sensible part of my brain (which is apparently really small) was saying "What? Oh no no no. No no no no! You do not want to get stuck doing all this yourself. No siree Bob. No, no, no." But the rest of me (which had control of my mouth, by the way), piped up with "yeah! I could do that!"

So I actually do know how I got into this. And I have to admit I'm kind of excited about it. But I just know I'll end up pulling much of my hair out...and I bet I'll be mighty twitchy by the time the tour rolls around too. And I just know there will be plenty of fans who will bitch about all aspects of the damned thing (price, production, packaging, etc.). I'm not really looking forward to having it ripped apart. I just wish some of these people would realise there are real people behind the projects they so happily shred. I think I might just not even read any threads or posts about it.

* edit/update

This project is getting going and I think it's going to be very cool. In reading back over the initial post I should have made it more clear that I didn't get talked into doing anything I didn't want to do. I'm thrilled to be doing it and it's a huge honour to be trusted with it.

My problem is based in insecurity -- I fear I really won't be able to do as good a job with it as I want. There is always that nagging feeling that I've been faking it all along and now I'm going to be unmasked as the fraud I really am. I think this is where the concern about others picking it apart comes from -- I'm always a bit afraid they could be right when they say "Oh that sucks!" Now when people say the same things about something I think is good that someone else has done I just think they are full of shit. But when I've done it -- even if I really love it and think it's great -- and it gets ripped apart, I can be really devastated. Shaky self confidence sucks big time.

I want to do this project enough to do it anyway. I'm not sure I'm tough enough to read what people say about it though. The thing is I know most people who buy it will be happy with it...but the ones who bitch seem to have much, much louder voices.


Blogger Freddie said...

Believe me I am quite familiar with how small that part of the brain can be compared to be big voice of the heart but maybe it won’t be so bad.
I can assure you one thing; I’ll not be counted among the complainers.
Take a deep breath, relax and have fun with it.
And good luck tiger! :-)

8:57 AM  
Blogger veleska1970 said...

ditto what freddie says. i hate it when i allow myself to get talked into things. :(

9:56 AM  
Blogger General Catz said...

I never shred. And i hope it's a great experience for you!

6:18 PM  
Blogger Queen Hatshepsut said...

I have a feeling SK can be very persuasive when he wants to be! Go on, have fun with it - I'll rip apart anyone who dares rip it apart - haha!

11:21 PM  
Blogger Sandy said...

Good luck, Holly. Screw all the shredders.

12:00 PM  

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