Wednesday, June 14, 2006

well fuckity

Most of the exhaust system on my car is going to have to be replaced again. I was coming home from Yellow Springs last night when suddenly the car got a really loud. Since I knew what it was, I just turned up the cd player and drove on. But it's really annoying.

Every couple of years pretty much everything after the catalytic converter rusts out and has to go. The last time the catalytic converter had to be replaced as well, but I'm hoping this time it's just the standard bit. The car (my infamous ratty little gerbil car) is old and decrepit and very possibly on it's last legs (tires?), so I don't really want to sink much money into it. But if it can keep going for a while with relatively minor repair that will be good. I'd much rather spend my money on things other than a different car.

I just called a muffler shop and am taking it in tomorrow to get that little problem fixed. I really do hate to drive a roaring car. Be glad to get it fixed.

I need to get my schedule requests in for working the arts coop gallery for July and August. I'm going to ask that I not be scheduled for the last week of July and the first three weeks of August (we each only work two - three days a month there, so it isn't a big deal). And it looks like I'll be missing our big Art on the Lawn show in August too. That's generally a serious no-no as it usually funds close to half of our coop's annual expenses and we are all supposed to work at it, but this year I just do not care. I've helped out every year I've been a member, and if I'm in the area I will help again this year, but if it's a choice of seeing The Church and working the show, I'm seeing the Church.

More importantly than me making sure not to be scheduled is for my brother (who will be taking care of the stuff I usually take care of) to get time off during this time period. He's been asking when I will have the dates for several weeks now since July and August are prime vacation months. I guess since I know most of the dates already I will see if he can get off for some of the east coast shows. Perhaps starting at Myrtle Beach, SC and ending at Sellersville, PA -- so far they have five shows scheduled in that time (although because I'm a chickenshit NYC makes me queasy -- maybe I can find someone to catch a ride with for that one) and they might manage one or two more. And then, depending on what is scheduled for the midwest, I might be able to do a quick trip to one or two of those shows also.

This is one of those times I would so love to be able to have few or no responsibilities and be able to just take off for three or four weeks and follow the tour. See lots of gigs, meet people I've been chatting with online, hell, just not having anyone or anything but me to take care of for a bit. Never really had the chance to do anything like that when I was younger, and if I can swing what I'm trying this time it will be a HUGE deal for me. (of course, I will almost certainly fluctuate wildly between being all excited about it and not giving a shit in the weeks leading up to it. I just know of I don't do it, I will regret it. Especially if they never do another US tour, and that is always a possibility.) Oh how I resented hearing my sister tell of all the shows and events she would go off to just on a whim, but she would never come home for a while and let me take off. I suppose it never occurred to her that I was kind of "stuck" taking care because there was no one else left. Same thing with my brother, except he never was much of a "nurturing" type so I could never really see him doing it anyway. Funny that now when I mentioned to him trying to figure out how I could get to catch some shows this year he said "oh, I can maybe get vacation so you can go." Damn. I never saw that coming!

But then when I really look at my sister's life I see that she's made sure to never have anyone or anything that really needs her. Even the cats came with her boyfriend/husband/ex and when that broke up, the remaining cat went with him. Although she liked the cat, I think she was relieved when she no longer had to think about it. It seems odd to me that her life is so devoid of any real responsibility for anyone except herself, especially when she likes to tell me what I'm doing wrong. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's a hell of a lot easier to do it "right" when you don't have several others needing attention and counting on you. For the most part I don't really mind taking care of people, animals, etc., and think I will always have something that needs me (I'm such a sucker for "strays" of all kinds). It's just that sometimes I wish it wasn't so stressful to blow it off and take some time just for me occasionally. Guess this little jaunt around where ever the hell I end up going will take care of that for a while. :-)


Blogger Queen Hatshepsut said...

Hey chickadee,
You certainly deserve some time for yourself, and I really hope you get it. And by all means, you have your priorities in order - you must see The Church! I only wish I was closer so I could meet ya...and yikes, don't ever say they might not tour the US again. TOO TRAGIC to think about. sigh

6:14 AM  
Blogger General Catz said...

i agree with D, you need that time to recharge your batteries and fuel you head. Even if i don't meet ya, i'm sure i'll feel your excitement from half a continent away!

and lol @ just turning up your CD player to drown out the noise. that cracked me up!

11:42 AM  

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