Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Bruiser update -- final

This was one of those times I wanted so much to be wrong. But I wasn't and I'm so very sad. After spending most of the day at two vets -- because although I knew he wasn't going to get better, hope is very powerful and I really wanted to be able to make him better, so when there was a bit of hope I grabbed for it and treated him even when in my heart I knew it was ultimately going to fail -- I had Bruiser euthanized at approx 7:30 pm October 30, 2007. I held him in my arms as the vet gave him the shots and he died very peacefully.

I know this might sound strange, but I was so proud of the little guy today. He hadn't had a lot of human interaction before, but he was so good and so sweet despite all the poking and proding. He was such a little trooper.

When he came around for food and attention/company he liked to be patted (he especially loved the top of his head and under his chin scratched), but would never let me pick him up or hold him. The only time I ever got to hold him was at the very end, for 15-20 minutes of goodbye and then for the actual euthanasia. By then he was just tired out and very weak. I'm glad I got the opportunity, but sad it was the only time.

When I had my old Cairn Terrier Patrick put to sleep earlier this year I had him cremated, but didn't have the ashes returned. He had a long full happy life with us/me and I felt the additional money would be better spent on the other animals. I don't feel it was any diss of Patrick and I've never regretted the decision. But with Bruiser I just couldn't do that. I felt so bad that he'd probably never had a real home and I wanted to give him a home, even if it was just for his ashes. Silly, but it makes me feel a little better.

This is the last picture I ever took of Bruiser. It was right before taking him to the vet. I'll miss that face with his fat cheeks, little pink nose and mangled ears looking up at me.

And here's a picture from a couple of months ago. He liked to come and snooze on the deck during the warm evenings.

RIP Bruiser honey.


Blogger Matt said...

That brought a tear to my eye, eek.
I have two cats that I love dearly and I'd be devastated if I had to do what you had to do.
You did the right thing. But I know hearing that doesn't make it any easier.
I'll be raising a glass to Bruiser tonight.

4:57 AM  
Blogger Jafabrit said...

:( I am so sorry eek!
I am with matt, will raise a glass to bruiser.

4:48 PM  
Blogger eek said...

The thought of you two raising a glass to Bruiser makes me smile. Thank you. :-)

1:54 AM  
Blogger Région Frontière said...

I'm so sorry to hear this. I know i'm a bit late on the blogs, been dealing with house issues.

I can't imagine how difficult that was for you, but i think you were brave, too. i'm not sure i could even be there when he was euthanized.

did the doc ever say what the problem was?

Take care

2:14 PM  
Blogger veleska1970 said...

i'm going to miss bruiser, too. funny, but last week i was wondering how he was doing.

i'm sorry it had to be this way, eek. but i think he knows he was loved by you.

count me in on raising a glass to The Bruiser. he was one of a kind.

3:24 PM  

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